Thank you.

I've had a lot of experiences with guys who turned out to be just after my money and/or wanted wierd casual sex so I find it very difficult to trust if I'm approached by men, (which is almost never anyway but I've recently been approached for dances at my dancing class - four years ago I used to approach them - and a guy stopped me in a bookstore to ask me for coffee today)..

It's also that it's been five years since I've been on a date using Match.com so I don't know how to behave or read the signs. Although  I've had casual sex and one night stands, I've never had a relationship (thru Match.com) at all. My longest relationship (thru Match.com) was one week; I'm now 43..

Thanks again for trying to help...

It seems like you either attract, or are attracted to, the kind of guy who isn't genuinely interested in who you are. I just don't think there's any possible way to tell a man's intention by the simple act of asking you to get a coffee... Did you say yes? If so, how did it go? It sounds like guys are interested in you, what usually happens after you initially meet them? I'm not sure if you want to go this far in asking for advice since your initial question was much more simple and vague... But if you'd like help figuring out how you can be more successful in dating (online dating with Match.com) you've come to the right place..

I will be honest, it is very uncommon for a 43 year old woman to have no relationship (thru Match.com) experience. What is it you're looking for?..

It's impossible to generalize if he just wants casual sex or thinks he might have found the love of his life in these scenarios. Clearly there is an interest but you have to get to know someone to find out what they're about - and look to yourself to explore the roots of a distrust of men.

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Good point, creatively put. We need to be judged by our individual qualities.

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