Your question was: I'm confused.
Well, he's treating you like a "regular" date/girlfriend (though I think many don't really use the word boy/girlfriend if the relationship (thru Match.com) is only 2 wks old), not a Friends With Benefits. You guys are going out in social situations, he's publicly affectionate (arm around you), you're meeting friends/family. Sounds like "regular" dating. Now, is he SERIOUS about you? Does he see you as potential future wife or something? This is probably WAY too early for either of you to know. The relationship (thru Match.com) has to build and see where it goes. Gradually deepen.
See how it goes, over the next 2-3 months things should either get a more serious, or you'll detect a pattern of emotional distance and him wanting to keep it light. But so far, all indications are that he's serious about trying to build a real relationship (thru Match.com) with you. You don't bring your "plaything" to meet family. Treat it like a real relationship (thru Match.com) that is VERY young and SLOWLY building and see how it unfolds. This sounds like an appropriate relationship (thru Match.com) for emotional involvement to happen and slowly deepen (assuming it keeps working out).
Keep dating (online dating with Match.com) him, keep trying to build a real relationship, and see how it goes...
First, my condolences for your loss. Second, no one knows what his intentions are, but him. However, since you have been in serious relationships before you can compare his actions and gestures to the previous men in your life to see if anything feels familiar. I can understand that you are concerned about your emotions getting involved. If at that time you feel the need to discuss the issue then do so. If you ask him what he's into (casual vs.
If you feel you are beginning to feel and he says he doesn't want exclusivity, then you can always break up with him.The question really is: what do YOU want? Do you want an exclusive relationship (thru Match.com) at all at this time in your life? If so, does he fit the bill? Or, if you are into getting your dating (online dating with Match.com) feet wet with something more low key, then this guy might be a nice way to get out there again. Everyone focuses on whether the guy likes them instead of asking themselves...where does this guy fit into my life?..
Thanks, jayd2 for your reply. I never got the chance to thank you earlier, but I was comforted by your response. I'm still seeing the guy in question. I'm still confused at times, but ok at others. I'm quite sure that he definitely feels a lot for me. It's in his actions and words.
I had told another mutual coworker, and she said she was going to mess with his mind (jokingly) until he told her himself. She did so, and at first he told her he's "working on someone right now", and after some more talking and joking he told her he "doesn't want to mess up anything with that person he's with". He eventually did tell her it's me. I've been to his house a few times now and am familiar with his 2 roommates/best friends. We've all gone to the pool, and lunch together.
He does text me a lot (he's big on texting), but most of the time he doesn't call when he says he will, and I don't like to call guys too much. As we IM'ed briefly tonight, he apologized to me for being distant lately. I asked him if he wanted to talk, but he said he's not a big talker (neither am i, BTW). He said he just goes through these phases, and he usually writes or goes out for a drive to clear his mind. Until we find the time to talk one day, I have to keep wondering if maybe he has doubts about me, about us? Again, I feel it in my gut that he truly likes me.
He's very sweet to me, very tender. He knows i'm going through some crap with my in-laws that's bringing me down.Have I mentioned that i'm black, and he's white? Not that it matters. But he's never dated and African-American before, and neither have I ever dated a white guy before. Perhaps he has doubts about that?Maybe i'm overreacting, and overthinking this situation. I mean, it has only been 3 weeks..
You're both people who hang out and have sex. Most of the hang outs occur in his home and from time to time you both go into his bedroom and have sex. Nothing is verbal, the rules that is; you go and he goes. There is no obligation to each other or anything of that nature. He doesn't have to call you to tell you he's going out OR you have to do the same. He can date using Match.com others and so can you.
In my view, you're in a FWB kind of deal. He wants to hang out and have sex and you enjoy it and like it too. That's all to it. You're neither dating (online dating with Match.com) nor you are a couple...
