Your question was: Is eharmony and match.com free?.
Two days isnt that bad. You want him to call you every day? If you want every day and he can't give you that and you're not willing to compromise, then it can't go anywhere. Personally though, I am not interested in someone who doesnt keep their word. If it's just now and then and it's for good reasons fine. But if x person is always saying x and never does it, then it's over. But thats just me. .
For some reason, your mom thinks your life is out of order. Is she totally wrong or ? Of course, people are always in a better state to be in a relationship (thru Match.com) if they are in a stable state in life. .
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Blair..
Kissthestars, I agree with what blair has told you. If you've told him what your needs are, and he won't or can't meet them, then this relationship (thru Match.com) can't continue. I don't think this is an issue of "giving it time" unless you see his job situation change.I also agree that it's a huge turnoff to be lied to. You really should tell him that it bothers you when he tells you he'll call but he doesn't. I think that if you really need this guy in your life, you'll have to make an effort to fit better with his life. I'm not sure I'd want to do that myself.
It's something you have to adapt to if you're going to fit together, and being a successful couple means fitting together even if it isn't always ideal for you.Decide how much time together is necessary for you to feel loved, convey this to him, and if he can't meet that standard, he's not the right guy for you...
He is demonstrating that he is not true to his word and that he is not there for you. Why settle?..
I'm more curious if what your mom is saying is true. Do you have your life in order? I find it hard to believe that someone's mom would lie to them about this EXTREMELY important issue. From my own perspective, seeing how you're dealing with this, I'd have to agree with your mom in that, YOU'RE NOT READY. Here's why I think that: for one you're acting a bit needy. If he says he'll call you, he'll call you. That is...
He's interested in you. By you NOT knowing what to do tells me that you're not MENTALLY ready for something serious. I hate to tell you that, but... until you can "date" without having expectations, I can't see how it would be productive..
Here's how I've learned successful dating (online dating with Match.com) works. The MOST important thing in dating (online dating with Match.com) is for you to have a SOLID understanding of who you are, where you're going and DOING the things in life that you're passionate about. This is all to be done WITHOUT a mate/boyfriend, FIRST. If you're not doing these things WITH a b/f, it would be hard for me to believe that your life is in order.
Second, once you have a "path paved" in your life, meaning... you know what you want, you know where you're going, and you're CONFIDENT with who you are, I think this is the best way to be, in order to date using Match.com successfully..
Here's what MOST people do that hardly ever works. They get desperate b/c everyone around them has a b/f, they rush into getting with someone having no idea what they want or who would suit them best, put their passions and dreams on the back burner HOPING their r-ship will work out. Some people spend many many years in a r-ship that was doomed from the start and they get pissed when things end and they have no idea why things happened the way they did. Well... things go bad b/c the proper order of meeting someone suitable was out of alignment. Have you noticed most the people around you haven't had really great and long lasting r-ships? If this is true, then you're being taught by the wrong people.
NEVER EVER listen to someone that isn't is a r-ship, has had many end abruptly, or people that are in the kinds of r-ships you don't think is right..
I learned all of this the hard way myself, until I FINALLY learned the proper order in which to date using Match.com successfully. Once my life was in order, I became the "prized man" that every woman dreams of having. I was very selective with who I dated and kept around me. If a girl was mentally unstable or was on a different path than I, I simply allowed her to go about her way and never looked back. I didn't' waste time with unsuitable women. Once I met the girl I'm with now, I was still out testing other women to see who would be the best fit for me.
I wasn't in a rush to be with someone, I wasn't acting all needy, b/c I knew what I wanted and I'm very confident with who I am as a man..
If only everyone knew the extreme importance of... having their life in order will make dating (online dating with Match.com) so much easier and much more rewarding. The sad truth is that most people that date, have learned BAD dating (online dating with Match.com) skills from people that also have bad "dating credentials." It's like the blind leading the blind. So that's why I'm very curious to know what your mom sees in you, for her to have said the things she has. I'd be willing to bet that she's probably right, and that you're just so desperately needing some "male validation", you're willing to not listen to her..
Listen... Having a b/f won't help if you're not in the mode of already helping yourself. He will just block the progression that you need to be at. If you don't have an amazing r-ship with YOURSELF, how can you have an amazing r-ship with someone outside of yourself? The simple answer is... "you can't.".
Just thought I'd share...
