Since he suggested getting a drink with a mutual friend of yours, then I don't see any reason why you couldn't ask him out as part of a group thing with Steve.All of your questions and hesitations would be settled with a group outing as opposed to a one-on-one date.As far as his "cues" I didn't see any coming from him in what you wrote apart from the "let's get drinks with Steve." If he made an effort to talk to you, it's probably because you two are friends on FB and it would be extremely rude if he hadn't, I think. Be careful of assigning your interest in him, TO him, and misreading friendly gestures on his part as "cues" that he's more than just a friendly guy.But ask him out in a group at first and see how that goes.

 CL-Breaking Up Is Hard to DoCL-Understanding MenCL-Ask the dating (online dating with Match.com) DoyenneRead This First:  How to Get Over Your BreakupWe waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.  Tom Robbins..

Thanks Sandra.I haven't talked Steve (the wild and crazy friend) in a while, and it might be hard to round up a group of people for drinks. Maybe I should just let it go, continue to be friendly if I see him, and see what happens.I'm reading The Soulmate Secret now and apparently I just have to have the right attitude and my dream man will come to me LOL. I actually do believe it, I just have to get myself in that mindset...

I agree with the people who say "just ask". What have you got to lose? The worst case scenario if he says no or it doesn't work out, it will be somewhat awkward when you see him again. It won't be any worse than when you first saw him after not e-mailing him back, and you got over that fine. If that happens again, you'll get over it this time as well...

Thanks Rosewater. I am bouncing back and forth between going for it and letting it go. But you have a good point in the grand scheme of things, it won't really matter that much if I make a move and he's not interested.I have a friend at work who I trust and she's friendly with him. I was going to ask her about her opinion on the whole thing next week.I'll keep you posted.....

......"I'm reading The Soulmate Secret now and apparently I just have to have the right attitude and my dream man will come to me".....Well, not exactly It's not like it'll magically happen that you'll somehow conjure up your ideal man just by having the right attitude and willing him to meet you.The idea is that no matter where we are in life, we attract into our life exactly what we put out into the world. So if at this point in your life, you're still confused about men and relationships, if you've been let down in them and are still carrying around the after-effects of those disappointments, then the type of man you will attract is someone who meshes well with the negativity being subconsciously sent out by you. You're effectively repelling the "good ones" Yes, you So it stands to reason that when you become the VERY BEST VERSION of yourself, then the partner(s) you will attract will be in tune with that overwhelming aspect of you, with the positivity that you'll put out into the world, they'll mesh well with THAT. Losers won't stand a chance against it. You'll just be in such a good spot that you won't allow yourself to be treated anything less than great, while at the same time offering up the best relationship (thru Match.com) skills you're capable of.So, it's already in you, you just have to start being aware of what you put out to the world. This is true for anyone.



 CL-Breaking Up Is Hard to DoCL-Understanding MenCL-Ask the dating (online dating with Match.com) DoyenneRead This First:  How to Get Over Your BreakupWe waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.  Tom Robbins..

Your best bet in this and pretty much all things is to look inside and ask YOURSELF what you want out of this, not someone else. They're not the ones wanting to date using Match.com him, you are. I've said this on my other board for years: It's YOUR life, how do you want it to look? And who do you expect to make that happen?Time to cowgirl up.

 CL-Breaking Up Is Hard to DoCL-Understanding MenCL-Ask the dating (online dating with Match.com) DoyenneRead This First:  How to Get Over Your BreakupWe waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.  Tom Robbins..

Normally, I'm a big supporter in letting the guy do the asking. But I think this situation is a little less clear.What about lunch? I could see a scenario where you're in the office chatting and you just ask, "Hey, want to grab some lunch?" And if there's a group going, that could be even better. Lunch is pretty low-pressure, plus you only have an hour, so if there's no spark, no harm, no foul.But after this lunch, I'd let him do the asking...

That's a good idea except I don't think he'll be back in the office for a while. We use him on a day-to-day freelance basis, so there's no telling when he'll be back. I think I'm going to try to find out when/if he'll be back. If it seems like we won't be using him for a while, I might take the chance and email him. If he may be back in the next few months, I may play it a little cooler to build the friendship and see if he asks. Oh well - I'm glad I'm not a guy. Asking people out is hard!..