Who thinks match.com's slogan is stupid? The slogan is "It's okay to look."?

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My first question is: Who thinks match.com's slogan is stupid? The slogan is "It's okay to look."?.

My next question is: I have been seeing a man for about two months. I feel like I am at a crossroads. Should I stay or should I go? He is a wonderful family man, and I am really starting to like him, but... about two week after we started dating, he told me that he still lives with his ex wife (they've been divorced for 5 years; he showed me the divorce papers) and that he had 5 kids (for whatever reason he initially told me he only had two kids). I accepted this. He said he didn't normally tell women either of these things because he never intended on getting serious with anyone. A few weeks later, he asked me to be exclusive. I told him no. Now, I feel like I do want to make a commitment but I am scared that there is more going on with his ex wife than he has lead me to believe. It's hard for me to believe that he could live with her for five years without having sex. He claims that it's been 4 years, but she felt comfortable enough to climb on top of him in his sleep the other night (a story that he felt comfortable telling me). His point in the story was, I think, to point out that she knows about me and how much he likes me. All it did was make me think that they are closer than I had believed. So, when I confronted him about the way I felt about it, he took it very lightly at first as if he felt flattered that I cared enough to dig deeper. When he realized that I was considering breaking if off, he told me that he bought her a house because he realized that it would cause problems in any relationship. He has previously said that she cant support herself financially and he wants to leave it this way for his kids. I dont want to uproot his childrens lives if this is the way that they are used to living. I feel that if she knew about me the way that he said and things are completely platonic between the two of them, then he would have offered to introduce her to me. I feel like that is the only way to set my mind at ease and that it wouldnt be unfair to anyone involved. Neither of us has met the kids, which isnt a step Im willing to take, so I couldnt ask that of him. I am really starting to develop feelings for him but my instinct is telling me that it doesnt add up, so I should end it now. I guess that is my question. I dont want to end it, but I dont want to get hurt. Should I ask him to meet his ex wife, or is that something that he should offer? And since he hasnt, should I just let it go or trust that what he is telling me is true?.

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Comments (7)

Your question was: Who thinks match.com's slogan is stupid? The slogan is "It's okay to look."?.

This is definitely fishy. His ex is comfortable climbing on top of him- does this mean they share a bedroom - but happy he's dating (online dating with Match.com) you.

I would definitely want verification of all this but I'm sorry - I still don't get how they're all still living together. And I dont know if I believe the he suddenly bought a house story.

You have reason to be dubious - so want to make absolutely sure this is someone you can trust before going further. .

,..

Comment #1

This guy is a head case and the fact that he told you that his ex climbed on top of him during the night is definitely a head game move. It is designed to make you jealous when all it should do is confirm that you need to get out of this relationship..

Of course they have had sex over the last 5 years. Does he think you are that stupid? As long as he is living with her he will continue to have sex with her and whomever he is dating..

He is a grown man who feels the need to lie about how many children he has...like you were never going to notice? If a grown man needs to lie to impress a woman...he has major issues that will eventually destroy the relationship (thru Match.com) over time and hurt you terribly along the way. You need not expose yourself to this horror any longer because who knows what other little tidbits are going to leak out over the course of your relationship?..

Comment #2

Well, I broke it off with him last night. We both teared up a bit. He told me I was wrong. He said what if you wake up 3 months from now and find out you were wrong? I told him that if he was really ready for a relationship (thru Match.com) in 3 months when he says she's moving out, then I hope that he calls me. I was really proud of myself. I wasn't sure that I was going to go through with it, but as soon as I saw him, I knew I couldn't develop any further feelings for him because I didn't trust him. The whole time we were at dinner, I kept thinking to myself that he was full of sh!t. He may not have been, but it seemed my mind was already made up. Back to square one again!..

Comment #3

Good for you! I'm sure it wasn't easy but I think you're absolutely right that he's full of BS..

Aside from the whole weird living with the ex thing, what kind of man denies the existence of three of his CHILDREN??? That's just sick, IMO. .

Sheri..

Comment #4

Congrats, you should be proud of yourself. I'm sure you will feel pain at times and wonder if you did the right thing but just remember... you do deserve better. Keep your head held high, pamper yourself, make yourself happy...

Comment #5

Hurray for you! This guy sounds more pathetic each time you talk about him. How can you regret breaking up with a guy who has no life and no future...and doesnt wish to change that? He obviously likes staying stuck in the situation he is in. A woman I knew once kind of fell for a married guy and he kept promising that he would move out of the house. Well, eventually he moved in with a friend on the couch and that wasn't good enough for her...and rightly so...he ended up moving back home and never got his own place. Your ex is already divorced and still doesnt want to move out and acknowledge his kids...how sad...

Comment #6

Congrats, I know it must have been hard but you stood up for yourself in this situation. Be proud!.

Good luck,.

.

YG.

Http://twodatediva.blogspot.com/..

Comment #7

This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.

candidablog.com

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This question was taken from a support group/message board and re-posted here so others can learn from it.